Seinfeld Quotes...


"Don't we have a deal with the pigeons?"
"Of course we have a deal. They get out of the way of our cars, we look the other way on the statue defecation."
- George and Jerry, in "The Merv Griffin Show"
"There's this creepy new guy at work. He just comes out of nowhere and he's right next to you."
"So he just sidles up."
"That's right. He's a real sidler."
- Elaine and Jerry, in "The Merv Griffin Show"
"It's the Merv Griffin set."
"How did you get this in here?"
"You just bring it in sideways and hook it."
"So where are you gonna sleep?"
- Kramer and Jerry, in "The Merv Griffin Show"
"I am going to sidle the sidler."
"You sidle? You stomp around like a Clydesdale."
- Elaine and Jerry, in "The Merv Griffin Show"
"I don't get these birds. They're breaking the deal. It's like the pigeons decided to ignore me."
"So they're like everyone else."
- George and Jerry, in "The Merv Griffin Show"
"Wait a minute. You mean to say that you drugged a woman so you could take advantage of her toys?"
- Kramer, to Jerry, in "The Merv Griffin Show"
"Jerry, now what you do with your personal life is your business. But when you're on my set, you clean it up mister!"
- Kramer, in "The Merv Griffin Show"
"We need a new format. We should shut down and retool."
"What about a guest host?"
"I'll pretend I didn't hear that."
- Kramer and Newman, in "The Merv Griffin Show"
"Maybe it'll be fun having a pet?"
"It's not a pet. It's a wild invalid. And it knows that I tried to kill it. As soon as it gets better, it's gonna gnaw my brain out in my sleep."
- George, about the squirrel he has to care for, in "The Merv Griffin Show"
"Where are the cameras?"
- Jim Fowler, appearing on Kramer's set, in "The Merv Griffin Show"
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