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Seinfeld Quotes... |
"THE FUSILLI
JERRY"
- "Elaine,
you always care who an ex-girlfriend dates. You don't
want it to be someone you know, and you don't want it to
be someone better than you. Now, even though the latter's
obviously impossible, the former still applies."
- - Jerry,
in "The Fusilli Jerry"
-
- "All
those mechanics do is work all day with their hands and
their big muscular arms on machines and then they come
home dripping with animal sexuality like Stanley
Kowalski. What a huge turn-off that is."
- - Elaine,
being sarcastic to Jerry, in "The Fusilli
Jerry"
-
- "I think
we really need to be in front of the television set. You
take TV out of this relationship, it is just
torture."
- - George,
to his mother Estelle, in "The Fusilli Jerry"
-
- "I'm out
there, George."
- "You're
not out there."
- "I am
too."
- "You're
not out there. You can't be because I am out there. And
if I see you out there there's not enough voltage in this
world to electro-shock me back into coherence."
- - George
and Estelle, who is dating again, in "The Fusilli
Jerry"
-
- "We were
in the garage. You know how garages are. They're
conducive to sex talk. It's a high testosterone
area."
- - Jerry,
in "The Fusilli Jerry"
-
- "Give me
a moan, something. I'd settle for a belch, for God's
sake."
- - George,
about pleasuring his girlfriend, in "The Fusilli
Jerry"
-
- "It's
Fusilli Jerry! It's made from fusilli pasta. See the
microphone?"
- "When
did you do this?"
- "In my
spare time. You know, I'm working on one of you George.
I'm using ravioli. See, the hard part is to find a pasta
that captures the individual."
- "Why
fusilli?"
- "Because
you're silly. Get it?"
- - Kramer
and Jerry, in "The Fusilli Jerry"
-
- "I'm
Cosmo Kramer, the Assman!"
- - Kramer,
in "The Fusilli Jerry"
-
- "Have
you ever met a proctologist? They usually have a very
good sense of humor. You meet a proctologist at a party,
don't walk away. Plant yourself there because you will
hear the funniest stories you've ever heard. See, no one
wants to admit to them that they stuck something up
there. Never. It's always an accident. Every proctologist
story ends in the same way... 'It was a million to one
shot, doc, million to one.' "
- - Kramer,
in "The Fusilli Jerry"
-
- "You
know what a good mechanic is worth? You can't compare
that to sex."
- - Jerry,
in "The Fusilli Jerry"
