Seinfeld Quotes...


"I don't know my alarm sound. I'm not tuned into it like it's my son."
- Jerry, in "The Alternate Side"
"These pretzels are making me thirsty."
- Kramer, practicing his line for a Woody Allen movie, in "The Alternate Side"
"Could you go out with a 66-year-old woman?
"Well, I'll tell ya, she would have to be really vibrant. So vibrant, she'd be spinning."
- Elaine and Jerry, in "The Alternate Side"
"I might have a whole new career here."
"You mean a career."
- Kramer and Jerry, in "The Alternate Side"
"You know what, let's put a few cookies in a blender and he could drink it."
"Cookies don't liquify."
"Yes they do, you can liquify a cookie!"
"Alright, I'll get the blender."
"What blender? I don't have a blender."
"You've got a blender."
"I would know if I had a blender."
- Elaine, Jerry and Kramer, in "The Alternate Side"
"Moving cars from one side of the street to the other don't take no more sense than puttin' on a pair of pants. My question to you is: who's puttin' your pants on?"
- Sid to George, in "The Alternate Side"
"I'll be ostracized from the community."
"What community? There's a community?"
"Of course there's a community."
"All these years I'm living in a community, I had no idea."
- Elaine and Jerry in "The Alternate Side"
"Can you die from an odor?"
- Elaine, in "The Alternate Side"
"Yankee beans, Yankee beans, I like my Yankee beans."
- Elaine, in "The Alternate Side"
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