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Friday, January 29, 2010


Character Assassination

Ever since he was a toddler and we took him to see the Berenstain Bears "LIVE AND IN PERSON!" at Barnes and Noble, my son has held any and all costumed characters in great disdain.

He doesn't hate them. He's just disgusted by them.

Maybe because he realized from an early age that they weren't the real characters, but just some sweaty teenagers earning minimum wage underneath all that cloth and foam.

We have hundreds of pictures of the family with characters like Snoopy, Garfield, Mickey Mouse, Homer Simpson, and the Wicked Witch of the West. And in almost every photo, my son is either missing or frowning miserably.

That kind of "my dad made me do this and now I'm going to ruin the picture" frown.

Actually, on our recent trip to Disneyland, he didn't frown so much. Instead, he gave a defiant stare into the camera every time we stopped to pose with a character.

The closest he's ever come to a smile was in California Adventure when Stitch bounded toward us, already in a mischievous mood.

All I had to do was whisper in his ear, "My son used to like you, but now he thinks he's too old."

That did it.

Stitch followed my son around the square for a good couple of minutes, trying to get a rise out of him, and eventually settling for a faint flicker of a grin.

After all these years, it was a real breakthrough!

The next time we go to Disneyland, I think I'll take the family for pictures with Snow White, Ariel, and Cinderella. After all, my son will be a teenager by then, and I doubt he'll have any trouble smiling for those characters.


Blogger Ed said...

If he won't--take me! I'll smile for em.

3:27 AM  
Anonymous Evan said...

The bright side is that he isn't scared of clowns. My daughters are terrified of those make-up wearing, ball juggling individuals. Maybe you can take him to those cosplay conventions too where people dress up as Lara Croft of Tomb Raider and Jill Valentine of Resident Evil. lol.

6:48 AM  
Blogger brettdl said...

I totally relate to your son on this one. I HATED stuffed humans and clowns as a child. The first time my kids met a stuffed human, they ran behind me.

3:14 PM  
Blogger Patti~~~ said...

My oldest son was in love with costumed characters as a little boy. He would run up to any one he saw (he was partial to no one in particular) and throw his arms around them for a big hug. I've always cherished those moments with my son, even if those characters were just 'sweaty teenagers earning minimum wage'.

My son is now 20 years old, recently returned from a tour in Iraq. And there, in Iraq, HE was the sweaty teenager who was run to with arms open wide for a big hug (or a candy bar or a pair of sunglasses)from a small child.

Blessings, Patti

10:28 AM  
Anonymous Dad Logic said...

I'm sure that Stitch had a great time tormenting your son as well. Sounds like a fun family trip.

We once were in line to take photos with the cowboy Woody and I overheard a kid tell him, "Woody, there's a snake in your pants." While I'm sure this was just a simple confusion over the "There's a snake in my boots" line Woody says in the movie, it gave me a huge laugh and you could hear a little laugh coming from inside the Woody costume as well.

I think you are on the right track with the princess photos next time. Your son can ask Ariel why she wears seashells (A: because a shells are too small and D shells are too big).

12:12 PM  
Anonymous The Zero Boss said...

When Neve was three, we saw a giant Winnie-The-Pooh at the mall. She wouldn't stop crying until we left.

She loved Pooh. She just didn't want to see him in person. And six feet tall.

3:02 PM  
Blogger MarmiteToasty said...

:) I noticed the 'monk on' face on all the photos of your lad standing with characters LOL......... he sure was having a great time LMFAO


11:37 PM  
Anonymous Evan said...

lol at the Ariel Comment. I wonder how'd she react though? Mermaid slap?

7:47 AM  

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