Don't Fear The Teacher
When my son was learning to ride his bike, he was afraid of falling down and getting hurt. So I always made sure to run along with him while he was figuring out how to do all those complicated bike things at the same time, like pedaling, steering, braking, and balancing.
I never let him fall.
A dad I know scolded me. He said, "You have to fall down and get hurt to learn to ride a bike."
This is the same dad who also once told me, "Bullying is good for your kids. It toughens them up for the real world."
I have never subscribed to the theory that personal growth must somehow involve pain. In all my years of education, I don't ever remember having to suffer through torture and injury in order to learn something new. Oh wait, I forgot. Grad school! So, there is an exception.
I can just imagine what homeschooling might look like in this other dad's house:
"Kids, today I want to teach you how to solve a polynomial equation. First, factor out the greatest common denominator. Good. Next, stab yourself in the elbow with your pencil. Nicely done."
Children don't need fear and suffering to learn. They need encouragement, contentment, and love. I gave that to my son four years ago and he's been riding his bike like a pro ever since.
I never let him fall.
A dad I know scolded me. He said, "You have to fall down and get hurt to learn to ride a bike."
This is the same dad who also once told me, "Bullying is good for your kids. It toughens them up for the real world."
I have never subscribed to the theory that personal growth must somehow involve pain. In all my years of education, I don't ever remember having to suffer through torture and injury in order to learn something new. Oh wait, I forgot. Grad school! So, there is an exception.
I can just imagine what homeschooling might look like in this other dad's house:
"Kids, today I want to teach you how to solve a polynomial equation. First, factor out the greatest common denominator. Good. Next, stab yourself in the elbow with your pencil. Nicely done."
Children don't need fear and suffering to learn. They need encouragement, contentment, and love. I gave that to my son four years ago and he's been riding his bike like a pro ever since.
Permalink posted by Phil at 1:05 AM
12 Comments:
I couldn't agree with you more. Like when a child gets hurt and the parent says, "Quit crying and toughen up."
Yes, the last thing I want to do is put fear into my son when it comes to math, which he loves.
I fully agree with you. When I taught Goober how to ride her bike last year, I never subscribed to the "no pain, no gain" way of thinking. She was riding excellently by the end of the summer.
I agree with you, too. It's one thing to let our kids experience the negative consequences of their bad decisions, and another to let them fall (literally or figuratively) when they're trying to learn something new. I think trust is an invaluable component of the teacher/student relationship.
I wish more dads thought like you.
I'm with you. No pain IS gain!
On a side note... I'm chuckling at the number of peeps that showed up for your give away. :b
Very good point.
We try to teach our kids how to act in case they run into a bully. They do have to learn what to do, but bullying is never 'good' for kids.
You know, I never set the boy up to fall off his bike. But I let him know that he was going to fall sometimes.
I wanted him to have realistic expectations about learning something new. Sometimes the good stuff is hard.
He did fall. And he tried again. And now, a couple of months later, we ride.
You are so right--just shows what crap has been indoctrinated into our society as "normal". It's wonderful to live "outside the box".
I totally agree!
I couldn't have said it better. Many of my students have enough pain and suffering outside of my classroom.Encouragement and kindness go a long way.
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