The Bad Dream
I had that dream again, where I'm outside our house, playing in the driveway. The black station wagon pulls up to the curb across the street and two men in dark suits get out and look at me. They hesitate to come closer. Suddenly my father walks up beside me, grips my shoulder, and says quietly, "Go in the house."
I'm inside the house now, sitting down on the couch. My sister sits on the floor watching an old episode of The Avengers. On the television, Patrick Macnee is walking through a cemetery.
Then I hear my father come into the house and call to my sister and me. In the hallway he grabs us and holds us tight and says simply, "He's gone."
The bad dream ends there, and I wake up with the cruel memories of lemon cake and limousines. And my brother's empty room.
I'm inside the house now, sitting down on the couch. My sister sits on the floor watching an old episode of The Avengers. On the television, Patrick Macnee is walking through a cemetery.
Then I hear my father come into the house and call to my sister and me. In the hallway he grabs us and holds us tight and says simply, "He's gone."
The bad dream ends there, and I wake up with the cruel memories of lemon cake and limousines. And my brother's empty room.
Permalink posted by Phil at 10:57 PM
8 Comments:
That's a rough one Phil. These things will always be with us.
Lemon cake. People always bring lemon cake. I think lemons are supposed to make you feel better. As if.
*hugs*
Oh, man.
I'm sorry to read this Phil, I don't know if it's replaying a sad time in your life? It still sounds so so sad, how old are you in your dream?
Apparently some say dreams are our way of working things out that we don't understand, our brains are reprocessing it but I have bad dreams of my little T falling in water, no matter where we went I dream of what could have happened.
It's really scary for me.
Wow. What a memory to have rolling around inside you. I'm so sorry.
I'm very sorry, Phil. Losing a loved one never really goes away. I lost my father when I was 17 and I still struggle with it once in a while.
Hang in there.
All the best,
Art
(who goes to call his sister that lives in LA)
Your story is heartbreaking...and I feel your loss also...
I remember too, Phillip. The memories of that day never stop hurting, no matter how much time goes by.
I don't remember lemon cake, I remember ham. And so many other things.
XXOO -R
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