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Sunday, February 11, 2007


Change In The Weather

My kids are like the North Idaho weather... If you don't like how they're acting now, just wait awhile, they'll probably change. And that has certainly been true with how they treat each other.

This evening I heard this coming from the family room:

Daughter: "I hate you."
Son: "Oh yeah, well I don't like you very much."
Daughter: "I'm not going to play with you."
Son: "Good, because I don't want to play with you either."

One hour later, they were curled up on the couch together watching a Brady Bunch episode, my daughter resting her head on her brother's shoulder.

And then, at bedtime, they went upstairs to brush teeth and conspire to clean their sink area.

Daughter: "Daddy will be so proud of us, maybe we'll get extra allowance!"
Son: "Shhh, don't let him hear. It will be a surprise."

I like them when they're like this, and I always let them know it with some sort of reward or treat. When they battle each other, then the punishment comes, usually in the form of The Lecture. They hate that. It's their most feared punishment.

It seems to be working. Lately we've been seeing more love and cooperation between them, with only occasional outbursts of bickering and fighting. Hopefully these "changes in the weather" continue to slow and diminish until there's nothing left but a sibling support system that lasts a lifetime.


Blogger Jen said...

Be thankful they get along at all. My sister and I wouldn't have been caught dead sitting together on a couch :)

8:55 AM  
Blogger Kati said...

I agree with Jen. The times that mine are content to sit with each other are few and far between;)

11:55 AM  
Blogger Phil said...

I remain eternally optimistic!

One of my goals is that they do not become so distant with each other as adults. My wife has three brothers who totally ignore her now, and one of the reasons is that when they were kids their parents fostered an atmosphere of competition and antagonism. They never learned to support each other, or to work together as a family.

12:11 PM  
Anonymous Daddy Forever said...

That sounds a little like my kids' love-hate relationship. I love it when they are in the "love" phase and I hope to see more of those love moments.

5:24 PM  
Blogger Chocolate said...

My kids aren't quite old enough to do that yet, however. Jessanna our youngest (1 year) is a tough little nut, as soon as she is big enough to snot her older sister in the nose, i'm sure she is going to get into some great blues!

7:48 PM  
Blogger Jeff - OWTK said...

I am looking forward to the birth of a sibling rivarly in my house. Amazing stuff. I have to understanding of this dynamic - my brothers are 12 and 11 years older than me. I grow up as close to an only-child as you can with two siblings.

7:56 AM  
Anonymous brettdl said...

My kids love each other when they're not killing each other. Lael loves to follow Seth around and imitate him. Seth loves to hug Lael until she screams.

But I think we're on the right road, long-term.

9:48 AM  
Blogger Katrina said...

We thought we'd avoid sibling rivalry when ours came along four years apart.

Ha. HA!

Fortunately, they mostly don't try to kill each other and even spend a lot of time in cahoots, planning their eventual coup.

5:44 PM  
Blogger Hliza said...

oh it's so cute when they start a conspiracy to get more rewards..!

2:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm late adding my 2 cents worth to the subject, but I also want my two kids to be friends as adults and not distant. I'm quite a bit older than my sibling and it's been only as adults that we are finally closer and enjoy time together. I'm making sure my two start that earlier...Sorry about your wife's brothers. How about you, Phil--are you close to your siblings now?

7:34 PM  

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