Doomed
Mir made a great comment on my post about divorce:
I completely agree that keeping families intact can sometimes be just as bad or worse than splitting them up. In my case I was doomed either way. I shudder to think of how I might have turned out if my father had been a strong influence on me. My self-esteem would certainly be much higher, but I know that today I'd probably be a selfish, materialistic, workaholic who has no relationship with his kids.
I'll take the way things turned out, warts and all.
I'm not a proponent of divorce, by any means. But I do tend to twitch a bit when people start talking about its effects on children as if intact families are exempt from long-lasting psychological damage.
I completely agree that keeping families intact can sometimes be just as bad or worse than splitting them up. In my case I was doomed either way. I shudder to think of how I might have turned out if my father had been a strong influence on me. My self-esteem would certainly be much higher, but I know that today I'd probably be a selfish, materialistic, workaholic who has no relationship with his kids.
I'll take the way things turned out, warts and all.
Permalink posted by Phil at 6:46 PM
2 Comments:
I happened to see these remarks while passing through and just have to add my own. As a child I used to pray on my hands and knees that my parents would split up if not actually divorce. It never happened. I had a miserable childhood, my father was an emotional and physical bully. I left home and moved up to London at 15 and moved to the US the moment I turned 18 - couldn't get far enough away soon enough. Let nobody ever delude themself that it doesn't stay with one forever.
Oh, I dunno about doomed, Phil. Just make sure to put plenty of money in the therapy fund. ;)
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